I know that most of you don’t want to hear this and in many cases, the reasons in this article won’t even apply to you. But if it does, I really want you to think about whether or not you want to get back together with your ex. Because, even though this website is focused on getting back with your ex, sometimes it’s best to let go and move on with your life.
Reason 1: You are just feeling rejected
In many cases, the only reason you want to get back with your ex is because you feel rejected. It’s hard to accept that someone who was once in love with you does not want you anymore. The feeling of rejection is really dreadful and we all fear it in every aspect of our lives.
But think about this, they did not really reject you; they only rejected a small slice of you. Many times, they don’t really know you completely as a person before the breakup. Many times, it’s just a small fight that leads to breakups. Or maybe, something in your ex’s mind that made think that you are not a potential partner. But whatever the reason is, you should not feel worthless just because someone doesn’t want to be with you.
Reason 2: You keep wondering about “What could have been?”
“If only I would have said this instead of that, we would still be together and we would have been happier. And then we would travel the world together and get a house near the country side and get married and have beautiful children.”
“What could have been” is just another one of cruel tricks that your mind plays on you. It is the part of your brain that prefers to have a lazy and stay in the comfort zone. It is the part of the brain that is afraid to explore the new opportunities in the world. This is the part of your brain that is afraid; afraid that you will never find love again. It is afraid that you will always be lonely and single.
If you find yourself thinking about “What could have been” all the time, you will drive yourself crazy and will fall more and more in love with your ex. This will stop you from seeing the world as it is and will make you ignore all the opportunities that you have around you to be happy and be in love with someone else. Believe me; I know how hard it is to control your thoughts after a breakup. I have been there.
But remember this, whenever you find yourself thinking about what could have been, you need to remind yourself that it is only going to drive you crazy and instead you should be thinking about what you should be doing right now.
In the end, getting your ex back just because you are always thinking about “what could have been” is not a good idea. Because you are living in a fantasy world which is completely different from the real world and in all honesty, that will never come true.
Reason 3: He/She was your first love
Well, if they were your first love, and you think that you two belong together, then I am not going to tell you are wrong. In all probability you are right. Maybe both of you were soul mates and you two should be together. But if you two broke up, this is a sign that you need to explore a little before you get back with them.
You need to go out there and date other people to find out what it’s like being with someone else. And if you are truly meant to be together, then you will get back at a later stage in life. Instead of trying to keep your ex to yourself, you should let them be with someone else for some time and meanwhile, you should also find someone else. This might sound like an excruciating thing to go through right now, but it is something that you need to do to truly understand love and be sure about everything in life. Be assured, that if you do get back together after being with someone else, your love life will be better than ever and you two will be together for a long time.
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{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
you are a genius…….
You are very helpful…
I don’t want him back but I would like to have closure which would mean he and I would need to talk. He hasn’t said a word when I asked to discussed us yet he was telling a mutual friend that everything was fine. That’s my reason for initiating the break up. My question is why act as if things are good when they are not.
The thing with me is that the love i felt between my ex and me is so rarely happening in my life that it is very hard to see sth like that happen ever again, so intense, he was so devoted to me, so in love with me ..and it took 2 yrs for someone like him to cross my path, someone who says I love you. Before him I haven’t heard that in 3 yrs !!!! And this time it was mutual. That the man who loves me is the man I love too. I already turned down 2 guys who showed up in my life very soon after the break up. So yeah, there is new love out there but what if I don’t seem to be able to have feelings for the new love?
the “heart” does not respond to logic it responds to reaction and emotion, i think u said it yourself somewhere. Im not trying to be mean im just saying u tell us the logic first and then u explain how emotionally its not that bad, but i honestly do feel better i cant argue with my heart on how i logically feel bcuz my heart doesnt believe in logic so even if u understand how it works u still feel positive
Hi sorry to leave this kind of moment here but don’t know how comments go but I have been with my ex for 7years n I have a wonderful wee boy with him, when we first started dating he made me feel free, loved n excited when my son came along I could not have been happier but I pushed him away coz “he was not doing what was needed” or what was “the proper way” n then after time he became frustrated n at times told me how difficult life was but in the end I pushed him away completely n he left me for my son I have 2 n want 2 see him though I’m grateful I have my son n I know that without him I would/will b fine but I just can’t c my life any other way except with him, people say I’m crazy n its “dead” but it has been 8 months since we split n I’m I’m writing this to u it is not lust, not want of rejection or I just want what is around him I love my family n I now know I love him please help I think I mucking up as I go
Hey, i followed your advice and after i got back together with my boyfriend, but after 2 months he broke up again with me, its just unbearable, all this pain, and i dont know what to do. Ive stepped over my pride so many times for him, and i still love him, but it just makes me wonderif hes worth my love, after all that hes doing and how moody he is… I still love him, i just cant get over him, hes my first love, but all his actions make me sick and wonder just why do i still care so much? He knows what pain hes making me feel yet he keeps on doing things every time… I dont know what to so. Mixed feelings here. I just need an opinion… He loves me too, but is it worth to keep trying with such a guy that constantly hurts me?
Hi my fiancee recently broke up wi me. We were 2gether over 6yrs and we have a 2yr old daughter. A few months ago i found out dat my fiancee cheated on me wi one of my best friends. I found out actidently becoz my fiancee was talkin 2 her friends outside and mentioned that she was getting off wi my best mate and i didnt knw and didnt need 2. I was furious and she appoligised and said it was a mistake i tryed to move on from it i didnt want something dat happened years ago 2 break us up. 1night my fiancee had her cousin over for a few drinks and she went t bed earley . Me and her cousin got talking and her cousin kissed me and i kissed her back and my fiancee walked in and cought us. She has kicked me out of ta house we were living in and she said its over that she will never forgive wat i have dne. As soon as i kissed her cousin i new it was rong of me and i have told my ex fiancee that it was a mistake but she wants nothing more t do wi me she said the only time i am 2 get in contact wi her is if i want t talk 2 my child. Wat can i do i feel lost confused and reali hurt .