How To Get Your Ex Back – 3 Step Plan

breakups are reversible

In most cases it’s possible to reverse a breakup. Is yours?

Are you hurting from a breakup?

Does everyone you talk to tells you that it’s over, to let it go and move on?

But what if it didn’t have to be over?

What if you want to fight for this relationship and win your ex back?

My name is Kevin, and I am writing this 3 Step plan to help you get your ex back, even if you think your situation is hopeless.

Breakup is a terrible experience. It leaves you in pain, feeling depressed, angry and often very confused. It is common to be needy at this time. But if you want to be together with your ex, you will have to be calm, unresentful, and HAVE A PLAN. Most of the breakups are reversible and if you do the right things at the right time, then you will have your ex back in your arms.

I am here to help you devise that plan. Don’t worry, it’s not some mind tricks that you will have to play on your ex. Playing mind tricks is not the way to go if you want to have a long term healthy relationship with your ex. This plan is based on human psychology and how to use its principles to have a happy relationship with your ex. I encourage you to read everything in this 3 STEP PLAN and then take action. I can only tell you what to do, but until you actually do it, you won’t see any results.

In the first part of this 3 STEP PLAN, I am going to tell you what are the biggest mistakes that people make after they’ve broken up. These extremely common mistakes end up hurting your chances of getting back together. This is perhaps the most important part of this series so make sure you read each and every point and follow it.

#1 Begging, Pleading, Being Too Needy

begging and pleading won't get your ex back

After a breakup people make the biggest mistake of begging their ex to take them back. I know it seems like the right thing to do right after a breakup BUT IT’S NOT. In fact, it is the worst thing you can do at this moment.

Nobody wants to be with a needy person. Pleading and being needy is unattractive and is only going to push your ex further away from you. It will only make them think that they made the right decision by breaking up with you.

#2 The Doormat Syndrome

Being a doormat won't get your ex back

The Doormat Syndrome in relationships is going out of your way, sacrificing your own happiness to please your partner. It means accepting everything that your partner wants you to do without having any demands of your own just to get back with them.

If you find yourself saying things like, “Please stay, I will do anything for you” then you may be suffering from the doormat syndrome.

You don’t want that. Nobody wants that and for two very solid reasons –

a) It’s unattractive. Nobody is attracted to someone who doesn’t have their own opinion, needs, or their hobbies. So being a doormat will most likely be futile if you want your ex back.

b) Even if it does work, you will have an unhappy and smothering relationship which probably won’t last very long. And I am sure that’s not what you want.

#3 Text Terrorism and Drunk Dialing

drunk dialing will hurt your chances of getting your ex back

Alcohol and phone DO NOT go together

This is again a very common mistake and yet detrimental to your chances of getting back together with your ex. People go out to have a few drinks trying to have a good time and the next thing they know they are calling their ex and making a fool out of themselves. Avoid this at all cost.

You have to make yourself scarce if you want to be together with your ex (explained in STEP 2 of this plan). Texting them all the time and calling them just shows that you are too needy and don’t have anything else to do. As I said before, being needy is unattractive and you want to avoid this at all cost.

#4 Smothering Them With Affection

I love you is not something your ex wants to hear right now

Saying “I love you” will NOT help your case

The logical approach to get your ex back seems that you should tell them how much you care for them and how much you love them as soon as possible before it’s too late. But trust me it’s not a good idea.

Well, chances are your ex knows that you love them and they know how much you care for them. In fact, if they were in a relationship with you, then they care for you too. But they decided to breakup anyways, didn’t they?

“I love you” and “I really really care for you” isn’t what your ex needs to hear right now. Smothering them with affection may even push them further away.


#5 Giving Them All The Power

At this point, even if it was your ex who broke up with you, you don’t want to give them all the power. You don’t want to be the one who is always available for them. You don’t want to be their contingency plan.

Acting like your life is over without your ex will only lose their respect for you. In the history of breakups, no one has ever taken their ex back out of pity. So, doing such a thing is only going to hurt your chances.

nobody takes their ex back out of pity

No one takes their ex back out of pity. Not even this kid’s ex.

#6 Freaking Out When Your Ex Starts Seeing Someone Else

After a breakup, you feel depressed, angry confused, shattered, and are really hurting. At this moment, if your ex starts seeing someone else, it just tears you apart. You feel even more depressed and confused. And usually, when your ex is in this rebound relationship, they seem to become too intimate too fast, which makes it even worse for you, for example it took them 5 months to get physical with you and they are already sleeping with this new person who they are going with for only a week.

In this situation, DON’T FREAK OUT. Rebound relationships happen after a break up, it’s very very normal. But the good news is that they don’t last. And the reason why they became so intimate with this new person so fast is because it’s hard for a person to go from being so intimate with someone to being completely single. That is why most people (especially girls) will become intimate very soon with their rebound relationship because they are trying to get to that level of intimacy that they had with you. But usually, the faster the rebound relationship progresses, the faster it ends. They will soon realize that the new person isn’t right for them and they were just being intimate to quench their thirst for intimacy. And once they do realize it, they will break up with them.

rebound relationships

Rebound Relationships are like Ice Creams. They aren't healthy and they don't last long.

So if your ex is seeing someone else, all you have to do is just be cool about it. That’s all. Sometimes, they start seeing someone else just to rub in your face that they are moving on. And you should not react to their relationship by telling them they are doing a mistake and they shouldn’t be seeing this new person. This is because if you tell someone to don’t do something, then you can rest assured that is exactly what they will do. In fact, if you do so they will go to the extent of prolonging their rebound relationship just to prove you wrong.

Instead if you do something opposite, and act indifferent to their new relationship and just concentrate on your own life (career, hobbies etc.), it will get them thinking. And their rebound relationship will end soon like all other rebound relationships.

Now the above mistakes look innocent but are fatal for your chances to get back together with your ex. So make sure you don’t do them. I know most of the advice I gave above is counter-intuitive, BUT IT WORKS.

At this point, you may be thinking what if I’ve already made these mistakes?

Don’t worry if you’ve already made these mistakes. Like I said, they are very common and chances are that most of you reading this would have already made some of these mistakes. It’s still not too late. You still have a good chance of getting your ex back. I just ask you to not make any of these mistakes anymore. If need be; print this page out and keep it with you all the time so you don’t do any of these mistake again.

Now That we have covered what you need to avoid, we can move forward to what you need to do. Click below for Step 2.


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Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Michael Provncha February 7, 2012, 4:53 am

    Well I am going to try these tactics! I really hope they work because I cannot get this girl out of my mind. Please wish me luck with this. I don’t want to love anybody else on this earth but her. <3

  • Hailey!! I want u back February 8, 2012, 6:20 am

    My gf just broke up with me and I’m so sad!!!:( It feels like I need her now to be complete. I’m gonna be lonely for valentines:( I don’t know what to do and I really care about her so much if she saw this IDK what she would say but be happy:( I’m not very good with talking to girls but Hailey is different. IDK why she broke up with me but ever since I was depressed. Hailey if u read this I’m so sorry but please come back to me.

    • Mildred February 22, 2012, 3:29 pm

      Hi i want you to give your Hailey some time. She too is going to feel the breakup then after sometime, send her a text and later leave her for a long time but meanwhile play have fun okay

  • broken heart February 8, 2012, 3:54 pm

    My GF broke up with me. We were in relationship since last four years..I didn’t have much time to give her but she was expecting a lot. Then we have completed our engineering. Then long distance relationship. She started loving someone else. When I found out I begged her. I cried. I started hurting me. But whatever I was doing to get her back she was going far from me. I never took alcohol during my engineering but now I am habitual of it. Her ignorance is killing me slowly. Still she loves someone else. My day starts with crying and praying to god and ends with alcohol. Please suggest me. I was a very happy guy. I used to laugh and made other laugh. But now I forgot how to laugh. Now I understood that she will never come back. So I told to my friends who are her friends also that I have a new GF. But I know that again love or relationship for me is not possible.

    • Latoya February 15, 2012, 6:37 pm

      Broken Heart, if someone knew the answer to getting over an ex and quickly, I think that person would be rich. But healing process comes to people at a different pace and it yes takes time. What I do know is, if you can surround yourself around good and positive people (family, friends). Take a trip, volunteer or just try a new activity, this might take some of the edge off. I saw that you believe in God. Yes, prayer is good thing too. Maybe even going to a counselor or some spiritual counselor, somebody to talk to, just help listen and mentor to you. Whatever you do, just don’t isolate yourself. Try to keep busy and slowly but surely you will see the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s a journey and sometimes it’s not going to be a good experience but you will learn from it and do better next time. Nobody is perfect and neither was she. See if everybody broke up at the same time and go into another relationship, then there really wouldn’t be much hurting and sadness. No stories to tell, nothing to learn from, nothing to gain. But through all of that, there is joy and there were good times and good things that came from it. So sometimes it sucks that you are not dealing with this break up as good as she, someone has to suffer, but it’s okay. You are not alone!

  • Alexis February 9, 2012, 3:46 am

    I was with this guy for almost a year now and we’ve been off and on. We dated about 2 1/2 months ago and it didn’t last long.. He started seeing some other girl and didn’t give me a reason. Then he asked for me back again and I gave him ANOTHER chance. We were really good for about 2 weeks (like always) and then start to part because he stops doing what it took to get me, when he gets me. I just found out that he’s texting one of my friends and wants to hook up with her. It’s hurting me because he’s doing stuff with her that he hasn’t done with me lately. I’m madly in love with him and I want him back but I don’t know if that’s a good idea or not.. I just want HIM. I can’t take my mind off of him. What do I do?! 🙁

    • Latoya February 15, 2012, 6:26 pm

      Alexis, sounds like this guy just isn’t ready for a serious or committed relationship. Going back and forth or taking a person back and then they turn around and leave you. This behavior only leaves you more and more confused and makes you obsessed with him over and over. That my friend is not healthy. You need to take care of yourself so you will be strong enough to resist this kind of behavior. If he keeps coming back and you keep letting him then what kind of standards are you setting? Remember you are the driver and you are in control. Don’t let your heart do all the driving you have to be smart too or it will leave you weak and confused and you will always take this guy back. It sounds like he is just playing to see if you are going to fall for him and when you do, he is no longer interested. Sounds like he is a serial dater. But you don’t have to tolerate it. I would try to build yourself up, stay grounded by talking to your family members, friends. Take up new activities (dance classes, sports, volunteering, job). Once you feel better about yourself and stronger then you can feel a sense of independence and control. So please take precaution and find out if and when he does return, why does he want to be with you. What will his intentions be with you this time. Short-term, long-term or just for fun? Because you need to find out what kind of person you are dealing with and by his answers you will know for yourself that you need to move on.

  • Rae February 9, 2012, 6:59 am

    I’ve been with the same person for 4 years. He asked me to marry him, we were planning a wedding. Then I came home one day he was gone.. it broke me bad.. after 8 months he came crawling back and I took him back. It has been two years and he sent me an email that we were done while I’m away. Fighting for custody of my daughter. After we talked cause we have some legal stuff pending together he says he wants to work things out and so now I really don’t know where we stand. I’m 4 hrs away from him and I don’t know how we can work on anything. The problem I’m having is letting go but I know I need too… I’m so lost and don’t know what to do anymore.

    • Latoya February 15, 2012, 6:14 pm

      Hi Rae, you all have a lot of history together and a child. What’s up with him always leaving and coming back? That’s not healthy at all for this kind of family. Maybe it’s best you see a counselor this time. I am not sure how old you all are. But there’s a reason he keeps coming and going and do you want that to be the story of your life? You need to set some standards for him. If he is going to be committed then he needs to work it out and you both get some help together to get to the bottom of why he keeps fleeing. If it’s a deeper issue and it’s not your problem then maybe it’s something that he has to work on. Maybe he’s having anxiety or doubts and get overwhelmed and doesn’t know how to deal with his feelings, emotions, etc. I don’t know the case. My ex of over 2 years did the same thing. Back and Forth, one foot in and the other out and I would break up with him cause I didn’t know if he was ready. Then we get back and then he would break up with me as soon as it got tough. He was afraid and scared. But I can’t live that kind of life never knowing when he’s going to come back and then leave. It’s mentally draining and stressful and you need someone that is always going to be there, regardless! That’s why I had to learn from my last experience. When I don’t get my way or get scared, we shouldn’t run but to sit down and get to the core of what’s “really” going on with US or the individual. Addressing the problem(s) is better than being in a relationship avoiding most of them until they spill over. I hope you are doing alright and everything works out.

  • mike m February 9, 2012, 7:12 pm

    I hope you have either a. moved on, or b. settled for a guy who wouldn’t cause you that pain. You’re so much better than that Casey. Life is beautiful and so short! Get everything out of it you can!

  • Marv February 10, 2012, 12:54 am

    Me and my girlfriend of 18 months broke up before Christmas. It was my fault, I was moody and grumpy and I guess maybe took her for granted. We have his & her tattoos, We avoided each other for a while until she saw me speaking to a girl in a club, she then approached me and broke down crying. Also my depressing tweets made her cry also… We got back together last week and we we’re both so happy constant kissing and hugging then Friday night at a club (I was drunk) I flipped when some guy was speaking to her which led to maybe we should be friends. We spoke since I’m the love of her life she says. I believe she is the one for me. She’s currently in new york and she’ll back next before valentines day. How can I get her back ?

  • alex barron February 10, 2012, 7:28 am


    Okay, so there’s this girl, we’ve been on & off for 7 months now. We’ve dated twice, which didn’t go too good. the first time we dated, we dated for 3 days. Due to trust issues, she told me she has never trusted me, the only reason she said yes was because she was already attached.

    The second time we dated for like two weeks, because she moved an hour away…and I’m only 14, so I can’t drive. I couldn’t deal with the distance and all.

    We talk everyday, all day long. I love her to death, we want to be together, but we don’t know what to do.


    • kyli February 14, 2012, 1:09 am

      OK wow you’re young! But listen…..I say you both just be friends and talk on the phone…..focus on school and your future…if you don’t know who you are and where you’re going in life then you have no chance with a nice girl….focus on you!!!!! And being how young you are I highly doubt you know much about your life yet….even though “you” think you do. Be friends!!! In a few years if you still like each other then go at it and see….but right now “flirting” is a good idea but nothing serious yet.

    • Daniel martin March 14, 2012, 6:55 am

      That’s almost the same with me. We dated for a year, then she broke up with me. I was heart broken. Then we got back together for a week, then she broke up with me again and I don’t know why she says she is dating someone else everyday but that is not true. But still I’m only 12, so I can’t do some things to get her back but still someone help me.

  • sara February 11, 2012, 5:02 pm

    I’m almost getting mine back, but we went to the same dance and he was slow dancing with another girl 🙁

  • Sam February 11, 2012, 8:23 pm

    I’m a teenager and I like this guy and we were flirting a lot and then he got my password to an account and found out that I have guy friends and got jealous so he stopped talking to me for a week. Now we’re talking again and he already asked me to be his valentine but now when I ask what he’s doing on valentines day he says idk and when we talk he still flirts and calls me baby but I want advice on what to do and how to get him back. I texted him but he never responded and I don’t want to just let him go cause I really like him. Does anyone have any advice?

  • kate February 11, 2012, 11:03 pm

    Hi guys,

    Just wanted to leave a feel good story and fingers crossed give you some hope!

    I’d split with my long term ex and like many of you felt, as if my whole world had ended. I did the usual crying, begging, beating myself up, cover every detail of the break up. THEN, decided one day to actually do what I’d read and stopped harassing him with a thousand texts a day. This was by far the hardest thing I’d done, I kept thinking what if he forgets me or moves onto someone else (I became OBSESSED with that!!). But within two days he texted me. And in the weeks before ALL he had said was how happy he was without me etc, but these were different. At first he asked for sex but please please say no, see I know its hard but I promise you, you will better if you don’t do it. And then he started saying how he wished we’d worked and slowly we got round to talking about giving it another go. But I let HIM bring it up. The trick is let him miss you, and he will eventually. It’s not easy but I promise you things can and will get better, even if it seems hopeless.

    All the best and keep smiling


  • kat February 12, 2012, 1:09 am

    I found my love then lost him. I hated that it didn’t even affect him and he didn’t shed a tear. I went into a deep depression. I couldn’t laugh, when I tried I cried. Rumors spread quick my friends tried to help me but I turned away. I didn’t want help, I wanted him. Everyone was mad we broke up when we were together for a year. One day I realized all the scars in the world wouldn’t make him come back. Finally I started digging my self outta this hole, I was in I finally recovered for the break up . Then he asked one of my best friends out. I was shocked why, why me. I was so mad of course she denied, thank God.

    Every night I asked God for one more chance which never came even though I still love him. And I don’t know why it killed me inside. He knew it bothered me and my friends to see me in such bad condition. My friends tried to get him back with me. Finally I found out the reason why we broke up. His sister hates me. Well at the point I didn’t care if she hated my guts. Well he made me mad so I got revenge.

    I dated one of his friends, not the best solution but it was all I could think of. One week later we broke up. So I went with this other boy I liked. Well that lasted a little while. We broke up but there was one problem when I was dating these other people I still loved my first love. And he knows how I feel. I found out yesterday he still loved me. Well I don’t know what to think. I love him, he loves me, what’s holding me back? He has my heart, I’m just wondering why I don’t have his. Should I go back? I just miss him so much we where the couple that people thought would make it. But maybe love’s just playing tricks on my mind. But why do I love him so much? – Kat

    • Latoya February 15, 2012, 5:36 pm

      Hi Kat, you are really going to have to be strong sweetie and try to pick yourself up, dust yourself off and keep yourself and mind busy. Because if he is the only thing that makes you happy, then if you get back together and then he breaks up again with you, then you will feel worse again, right? So try to find a way to make yourself happy, day by day. Take baby steps and do something for yourself in a positive way. The last thing you want to do is turn your friends away, depend on them, this is those most delicate time for you and you need every body’s help, family and friends. Dating other people might fill the void but only temporary. It’s okay that you still love him and he was special to you — it’s okay to feel that way and you may feel that way for a while, but try to accept that it is over and may be for some time. If you get in your mind that it’s over and some how manage to keep yourself occupied and get to a better place and heal, then who knows what the future holds. But waiting and waiting and worrying is only going to make you more sad and depressed. I know how you feel and I hope you take this time to work on yourself, even if some days you feel like crying, but get it out, pray for strength, write it down, talk to someone, but just don’t keep focusing on him cause you won’t be happy either way. Some times God allows things to happen so we can depend on him and become better people for ourselves. I hope you are doing a little better.

  • Joe February 12, 2012, 3:09 am

    I asked my ex out and she said yes but then she decided she just wants to be friends but she has a lot of friends that are guys and I went to the mall with her as a friend and I was upset cause it brought back memories so she realized I was depressed and hugged me 4 times to try and cheer me up but I just stood there. Then she got mad so she asked me why I just stood there and I told her that I wanted to be more than just friends and now there is an awkward silence, what do I do?

    • Latoya February 15, 2012, 5:46 pm

      Joe, it sounds like your feelings for her are still strong and they are running deep down to your soul. So obligating yourself to her, just to be in her company as “friends” is not benefiting you whatsoever or making you happy. Maybe you should just take some time away from her so you can get to a better place of feeling comfortable being just “friends”. You are going to just make yourself miserable appearing to be “cool” with being her friend. You need to build yourself up again to feel good about being single/independent even if you and her never get back together. When you get to the place that you feel OK about it, then probably tell her you are ready to be friends with her. But do it on your own time, I am sure she will understand that. Sometimes we want something so bad that we can’t have but if it is truly ours then it was never gone in the first place. Time tells everything. Take time out for yourself and learn about somethings you may want to work on and change about yourself. This is a learning experience. It sucks but we have to push through it so we can get to a better and happier place.

  • nadia February 12, 2012, 5:43 am

    I miss my ex, we broke up about 6 months ago but still in touch with each other like a couple until he started to move on, I guess? He’s in Australia and I’m in Malaysia, he is so far away from me. He was here in December 2011. We dated twice, but it seems like it doesn’t work at all. He treated me cruelly. I tried to do everything he wants but it seems like my effort is such a waste. He went back to Australia already and didn’t contact me at all. It has almost been a month. He didn’t return my calls or contact me through whatsapp. I miss him and I need him, please help me 🙁

  • Aj February 13, 2012, 4:54 am

    I did everything you said not to do… what do I do now?…

  • Baylee February 13, 2012, 10:47 am

    I dated my GF for almost 3 years and we broke up after a stupid fight. I made a lot of mistakes listed here to try and get her back and she eventually did. And then we dated again for a month but then she dumped me after we got intimate for the first time. I feel like I was her rebound which is weird considering I’m her ex. What can I do to prevent this again? I’m 15 if that makes a difference.

    • sean February 16, 2012, 7:18 am

      Relax dude its easy I’m 10 I did the opposite of what he said to do. Flipped it. She started going out with this kid Jarret. I kicked his ass, got Kayleigh back. Kayleigh calls me her hero and Jarret calls me sir, it’s a good life.

  • kyli February 14, 2012, 12:55 am

    Hey, I know its hard but if you still need help here’s an advice…. you have to be honest with yourself, if you really think you didn’t do anything then time is important. Time tells all! If you’re in the wrong, then be humble and explain without fighting or getting at it with each other! Maybe it just wasn’t working, well then if it is meant to be then this is your opportunity to go out and discover who you really are. Enjoy yourself. If you can’t be happy by yourself then it will be even harder with someone. It’s hard to listen to anyone when you feel like this but try to stay positive and look at how much better life will get for you…this is temporary….if he is worth it….then while you’re waiting let him know your feelings and let it be for a while:) Hope I helped!

  • kyli February 14, 2012, 1:00 am

    I agree with Amel…guys you have to let the girl know how you feel! Otherwise how will they know!

  • Plastron February 14, 2012, 4:28 am

    So when my first girlfriend dumped me I was devastated. I texted her and texted her. I said I was OK with being friends, only to make her feel rejected…
    It was really crazy times, I broke a car window, and would leave notes in her car. Eventually I discovered a secret. A powerful yet effective secret. I’m serious. I want to share it with the world. I want to find out that at least another person tried it and it worked for them to. Here it is “I don’t love [Ex’s name]”. Repeat it to yourself, concentrate. The pain is part of the process. Repeat “I don’t love [Ex’s name]” until you think you have to.

    But before you do that, make the decision to yourself that you don’t want to love that person, and block numbers and emails.

  • Latoya February 14, 2012, 5:46 pm

    Hey Megan, I know it’s easier said then done. But at this point if you are not comfortable dating others, then in the mean time of waiting or trying to get back with your ex, don’t keep asking him, hanging out with him, talking all the time to him, as if he is going to become more and more interested in you. The more you work on yourself, keep yourself busy and do things that you like (hanging with friend, sports, hobbies, new things), then you will actually be making your self not so much available to him and appearing to not be so anxious to be with him, if you get what I’m saying. The more you get use to NOT being with him all the time, maybe through the new things that you are doing to build yourself up, then you will feel that maybe you don’t want to be with him, meet someone else or just choose to be single. Trust me, you will stress yourself out more worrying day after day if you are going to get back together. And if you wait and worry, well then how are you benefiting from this? How will he be interested in you or attracted to you again, if you are not making some changes in your life or doing things to better yourself. I hope that helped.

  • Latoya February 14, 2012, 6:04 pm

    Well Ethel, if you still love him, then talk to him and see what he has to say. People do deserve a chance to explain themselves especially if they didn’t do much to hurt you, but your feelings. You can either learn to forgive him and be with him or forgive him, hug or shake hands and move on, especially if you still have this desire to be with him. You may be afraid now, but what if you wait and look back regretting what you should have done all along. Call him up or agree to meet with him and see what he has to say, what’s the harm in that!

  • Hannah February 14, 2012, 7:12 pm

    So I started talking to this guy and everything was so great, then one day his ex called and he went back. It hurts so much because he said that he would never use me and stuff like that to the next day not even talking to me to the break up text? And now he is staying at her house. I know I need to move on and just deal with it but I am friends with his new girl on Facebook. And she saw that me and him started dating so I thought that she is just pissed so she took him back. I need some help with this.

    • Latoya February 15, 2012, 5:59 pm

      Hannah, it was a joint decision (on both guy and ex GF). So the guy that you were dating, he apparently wanted to get back with his ex. If she is playing him just to make you jealous and doesn’t really want him, then let him figure that one out for himself. If I was you, I wouldn’t be to concerned about taking him back, especially if he has just recently broken up with the girl. It’s never good to be the “rebound”. So I would take precaution as you don’t want to be used like that. Just count this as his loss and your gain, especially if you are ready for a new relationship. I don’t think he would be emotionally available to you starting a new relationship, don’t you think? So why drag it out and see where it goes, only for you to find out he was using you or discovering that he keeps running back to ex, texting and talking to his ex — too much confusion girl. If you are stable and emotionally ready to start dating and ready to be in relationship, don’t you want to start fresh with someone who has the same intentions in mind? You will find yourself stressed and exhausted and disappointed trying to win this guy over and for what? Plus there will be an ex involved too. Sounds like drama waiting to happen. Well you choose what you want to do and what you are willing to put up with. I wish you to look else where.

  • Janet February 16, 2012, 1:21 am

    Hello I’m in a relationship, we’ve been on and off. I’ve been worried, he had told me that it isn’t going to last. I’m trying to be good, show him my love, how can he see that spark again? How can he fall in love with that person he fell for? Why is he saying that it’s not going to last?

  • jossy February 16, 2012, 8:59 am

    My ex broke up with me, it’s been a week and two days, I miss him heaps and it’s so hard at home because I’m the oldest.
    But he has a rebound girlfriend and she is everything he said he didn’t like in a girl, how do I not get jealous?

    I mean I don’t wanna ring him like I have in the past and tell him how I feel because I’m just pushing him away. Please help?

  • alana February 16, 2012, 8:20 pm

    I met this lovely guy at college, we did everything together. He change all his bad way and I said to my self that this was a beginning of something wonderful, little did I know it wasn’t. I was a virgin, and I told him he would have to wait. After waiting 10 months he got tired of waiting and we actually had sex three months after his course ended. When he left people called him saying I was cheating, he believed and he said we should be friends but we still had sex for about two months after the break up. He said to me one day he is scared of his feelings for me they were too strong and he doesn’t know why he gets so excited around me. Is his feelings that bad? He still want to hug and kiss me if I allow him sex too. So what’s the problem and he finds a problem in me dating but doesn’t want to admit it and I hear he has a girl.

  • Ben February 19, 2012, 4:54 pm

    I’ve broken up with the most beautiful girl I’ve ever met. I had been with her for 2 years and she ended with me and a day later, she goes out with this guy who never liked me so I hope this advise helps me.

  • Sky February 19, 2012, 6:59 pm

    I love my ex girlfriend more then anything in this world. We started dating in Dec of 09 and broke up in Nov of 11. Recently she text me and told me she missed me and wanted to hang out. So we did. We hung out for a couple days and even started dating again. But she recently left again. 🙁 I’m broken in so many ways. I can’t eat, sleep. I feel like I can’t go on with my life because she’s not here. I want her back and will do anything for her to come back. What do I do? Please help.

    • Latoya February 27, 2012, 9:47 pm

      Sky, she sounds like she is not ready to be back in a relationship with you just yet. Maybe you should give her some space and some space for yourself to feel independent again and be in a better place. Right now you may not feel like that. But you got to do this for yourself. Or feeling depressed and down is definitely not going to make her fall for you again or want you back. Trust me, it’s been 5 weeks for me and I do cry once in a while, but I am getting stronger and better with every week that goes by. Writing is good, praying as well. Talking to your friends or someone you trust is good. But stay active no matter what you do, so that the time will go by. I don’t think it’s best for you to keep seeing you ex, cause it’s almost like once you see any hope for you all to get back together you then get happy again. But then when she back off, you are sad and she is not the person that controls your “happiness” YOU DO, my friend. Hey you will be Okay, just give it some time. I am sure if you all were meant to be together or be in each others lives, working on yourself and bettering your self will get you close to this point. The state that you’re in is not going to attract anybody. So think of it like that. Take care of yourself and I wish you well.

  • Justin February 20, 2012, 12:43 am

    My ex and I were together for ten years and have two kids together. We’ve had some time off from one another during that time. But this time it feels different. A week after she left I found out about a friend she had and now they were getting closer which I had my feelings was happening (late nights out or not even coming home to me at night). So at first I accepted it and it hurt but was moving on. I threw myself into the dating game and met someone who by now is ready to spend rest of there life with me, but I feel guilty cause I find myself saying things that are not true all the time just to make her feel good and get attention from her. It’s been two months since the ex left and I’m seeing that her new relationship is not heading in the direction she was planning on. I’ve really been struggling on my thoughts and worries of what is she doing and who she is spending her time with, and I’m constantly trying to stop myself from questioning her. I have some strong feelings for her still and honestly I want things to go back to the way they were. She has told me in person that she misses me and my mind is running wild. I feel terrible that I might hurt the woman in my new relationship but after reading many articles it seems it points to a re-bound relationship. It was never my intention to hurt anyone, but I feel guilty that I’m hiding my feelings about my ex from my current friend. All I can keep thinking is how I want it to go back and show that I do have feelings still for her and that the issues we had in the past I’ve worked on. Any advice will be helpful.
    Thank You

    • Latoya February 27, 2012, 9:55 pm

      Justin, you hit it right on the head! She sounds like a “rebound”. The longer you progress or prolong this relationship, the harder it gets to break up with this person. You need to find a good way to let this girl down, so she can move on with her life and meet someone that is ready to give her what she is looking for. If you continue dating this girl, it will just lead into a bitter disappointment and women don’t like to be mislead. Before she grows deeper feelings for you, you got to let her know soon. Sounds like you don’t need to be dating anybody seriously PERIOD. Dating is okay, just to get out of the house, but that’s it! If you still have feelings for this woman and they are strong, well then you got to get yourself together and better yourself. That means doing something for yourself that doesn’t involve dating all the time. Take a boxing class or some kind of sport, or educational class. Something that you always wanted to do, but never had time to do it. Make time to do what you like or help someone else out, like volunteering or something. If you need to talk it out, then go to a mentor or counselor. But don’t try to stay in a lot of contact with your ex, cause they will just make it look like you always want her back. Of course you want to be in her life, but you sound like you have somethings to work on before all of this can happen. I hope that helped.

  • Sunshine929 February 20, 2012, 4:39 am

    My ex broke up with me about 3 weeks ago. I love him very much and want him back. I have partial seizures and I was supposed to be taking medicine for them but because of the side effects wasn’t. But I told him I was because I didn’t want him to worry. On a cruise I had an episode and when he asked I told him I wasn’t taking the medicine I have since then stopped drinking (he didn’t like that I drank too much)  and have been taking my medicine. I have made some real changes and I know he knows but I believe I lost his trust. He won’t even talk to me?? We were together almost 2 years. These 3 weeks have been horrible. What can I do? I miss him so very much. I’m trying to work on myself but.. I feel helpless.
    Please help…

  • Chrissie February 20, 2012, 7:08 am

    Someone help me please. My boyfriend of two years broke up with me last night saying he really doesn’t want a relationship. He’s been divorced twice and so have I. But for the last 2 years, he tells me how much he loves me and tells everyone we know I’m the best thing that ever happened to him. Up until 2 weeks ago, he was still making plans to go places with me, etc. The only thing I know for sure is that there’s no other girl. Please help, my heart is broken and I feel like my life is over.

  • J February 20, 2012, 1:40 pm

    My wife walked out after a 10 year relationship 6 of those years we were married. We had always been close with what we told each other was an unbreakable bond. She didn’t have the best relationship with her family growing up so I became her knight in shining armor if you will. While already having confidence and self respect issues, I made sure that I made her feel the best that I knew how. She loved that I was, as she told me, the kind of person that she wanted to be… Easy going, carefree, upbeat, funny and most important strong and confident. She became very comfortable in the relationship, so much so that she put on a lot of weight which looking back clearly exacerbated the underlying problems.

    Things were still OK between us but she hated herself. Then a few years ago I lost my job and she was not working and we both ended in a state of depression worrying about bills, feeling sorry for ourselves and wondering why us. We got through and both found jobs which now allow us less time with each other but unfortunately such is life. Since that state of depression we have both changed drastically. January of 2010 she made it her goal to lose weight and get back in shape which she did but also transformed emotionally personality wise. I on the other hand realized after she left that I somehow lost myself in her after my depression. Over the course of the last two years she changed mentally as well wanting different things and fighting with me more and more. Having the same arguments over and over again and nothing changing especially on my end looking back now. I now realize that the signs were clear and I heard what she was saying but I wasn’t listening. I was and am still caught in the grips of depression although not to the extent it was before. She said I controlled everything about the relationship most importantly her and I was the reason she didn’t have friends anymore saying I would get jealous if she wanted to have a drink after work with a female coworker. The sex was terrible when it happened, there was no romance, no spontaneity, no more spark like there used to be. I couldn’t make up my mind even about little things like where to go on our Saturday date nights, choosing to let her decide thinking whatever makes her happy is fine with me. Big mistake obviously. She told me she wanted romance, she wanted to be touched and made to feel like the woman she is, she wanted a MAN who would take charge and be strong and confident which she clearly wasn’t getting from me. Not the insecure jealous pathetic creature before her.

    She wanted the old me the way I was when we met and how I was for the first 6-7 years of our relationship and even told me that but I was so wrapped up in my own issues that every fight about this made me sink deeper instead of waking me up to the fact that real danger lye. I was resentful that I was there for her through a few years of her self-loathing and depression and took on the role of her provider and protector in everything no matter the cost and when I need her most all I got was chastised for my shortcomings and faults whether right or wrong. She started talking and texting back and forth with a supposed old college friend a lot over the course of a few days and when I was alerted by my cell company about overages and unusual usage I investigated and asked her who it was. She told me a girl friend from work. I called and of course it was a guy. When confronted she apologized for lying saying it was harmless and didn’t want to hurt my feelings or make me jealous. But the more we spoke about it and the few more lies I found about it made her flip it on me that she couldn’t believe I invaded her privacy, that she would never do that to me and she could never trust me again. Stating again about my control over her lack of freedom and friends she said she was drowning in the relationship and I was smothering her. We argued again about this friend who had all of the sudden come back and I told her again for the one millionth time I had no problem with her going out with friend’s guy or girl as I never not trusted her before but only now as long as it wasn’t him. She exploded telling me I’m checking up on her private things and I can’t tell her who she can and can’t be friends with. When she came home that night I had a few drinks and we fought and I was hurting so terribly that she would rather talk and text him than me (which she told me) and that she wouldn’t even tell me his name for fear of me ruining his life that I said many nasty things to her like she had done to me all of the fights before. She packed a bag late that night walked out and told me I was a psycho and we were done.

    I called her next morning apologizing and crying and told me we were done. Finally I got her to say she probably would not come back as it was a 90% chance that she wouldn’t and needed a break as I was smothering her and it could be a week or 2 or a month but did not want to see my face or hear from me. I let that go as it was better than an absolute no and told her that I wouldn’t text or call for a week. I know I haven’t been the best husband but I tried to love as much as I could give and I never did nothing intentionally to hurt her. I just want to fix myself for me and for us. I just need one more chance to make that happen. It is terrible that after 10 years it had to come to this situation to open my eyes but they say everything happens for a reason and I have always believed that. I’m hoping this is a blessing in disguise as I am sure that if this didn’t happen now with me finding out, there is no doubt in my mind now that it would have down the road and may have been too late. She has to know how much I love her and just hoping for one more chance. Thank you all for listening.

  • Cody February 20, 2012, 4:24 pm

    I have been in the saddest mood ever after I lost my girl after 3 and a half years:( I was told that we never clicked because we fought too much. The sad thing is she won’t give me a a chance to prove to her that it won’t happen. We been off and on a lot!!! I’ve been broken up with her for about 3 days. All she wants to be is friends. I want to be more than friends because she is the only girl that lights up my day. Every moment that I see her. She also told me she needs space to think about things. All I want is her in my arms right now. What should I do???? HELP ME PLEASE

  • Cody f February 20, 2012, 9:04 pm

    Hey I need some major help!!! Me and my girlfriend broke up 3 days ago!! She said she didn’t feel a connection anymore because I don’t give her space to hang with friends. I’ve been with my girlfriend for 3 years 6 months. All I think about is having her in my arms. But we don’t text anymore and she said she wants space to think. I want help and advice on what should I do when she says she just wants to be friends?? What can I do or say to make her come back to me?? I forgot to mention I work with her too so how should I go about it?

  • h February 22, 2012, 12:38 am

    It’s been 2 weeks since she broke up with me. She told me that she loved me and cared a lot about me, but she wasn’t head over heals in love with me. We were together for 3 years and had a lot of fun, then she said she was unhappy with our relationship. She even told me she cheated. We were best friends before we got together and after all that I still believe she’s the one. I talked to her a day ago and she told me that she was happy with the decision she made and that she wanted to be friends. What do I do because I want to be more then friends. I want to marry her. Do I still have a chance or should I give up? I tried the no contact thing for about a week, I’m starting over again. I’m going to the gym and taking better care of myself but what if she doesn’t come back or can I even get her back?

  • Anthony February 22, 2012, 10:41 pm

    So my ex-girlfriend of 1 year & 5 months broke up with me 2 days after Valentines. It was a mutual decision, but I knew inside I wanted to rebel and stay with her to give it another shot. But I wanted to respect her decision and so I did. I’m still hurting inside and I miss her so very much. I tried to give her the no contact, but sometimes after she finishes work she sends me a text. Heartbroken and so eager, I replied and it ends up a long conversation. Yesterday we hung out, and I tried to act if I was friends with her but I ended up making her feel bad for me and hurting myself as well. She always tells me she’ll always be there for me but she doesn’t want to have a relationship with me anymore, she doesn’t want to give me hope. I felt so heartbroken when she said that. After it was time to go, I made her feel cheery a little, and when I fully understood her words. She says she hopes that I will change for the better, and I responded “I will over time. And when I do reach that point, I’ll fight for you to be back in my arms” then she giggled. It was a nice way to end my day, but still it left heartbroken. Today, I stopped what I’m doing; texting, calling, and what not and start the real process. I just can’t get over her. I know in my heart she is the one for me. Do you think she’ll ever feel the same way for me when we started going out?

  • Shentoria Monae February 27, 2012, 3:10 am

    So, I’ve been broken up with my boyfriend for about a week now. I know it seems short, but hear me out. The reason he broke up with me is because I got intoxicated and acted inappropriately with an old hook up. Even though I was taken advantage of, he says he lost his trust in me. We’ve been close friends for about four years and started dating six months ago, but this relationship has always been extremely close. I love him more than anything, and I realize what I did was wrong. Since we were such good friends, no animosity is there and we both have been contacting each other lately through text. We also have to see each other every single day in class. Is it too soon to be talking? He seems like he’s trying to act as if he’s fine, yet I know in my heart I hurt him very badly. Can I do anything yet to get him back, or should I wait awhile more to let him heal, and remind him of the things he loved about me? Like I said, we both were close friends and want to still be friends but I just want to be with him again. Is there anything I can do? Any advice is welcome.

  • Latoya February 27, 2012, 9:41 pm

    Hi Loly, you say you all been on and off for 6 years? If it’s been that long, it doesn’t sound like it’s going to get any better. Maybe, you should realize that if he’s not going to be consistent and frequently neglects you and the relationship, then maybe you should start being single again to try to figure out what you really want in a partner, especially if you want to get married. It sounds like marriage is not going to make this better so please don’t do something that you might regret. If this is his personality, then you one, either have to suck it up and accept him for who he is or two, stay broken up and see try to date other people. Its a harsh reality, but if you are constantly the one that is changing and evolving and your man is not trying to keep up with you, then you will always be ahead of him and never be on the same page when it comes to what you both like from each other and want out of life. You can make him do that or put that kind of pressure on him. You have a lot of history with him, but it just sounds like he is not ready to “step it up”. You have to decide if you can live with that. Cause choosing the person for yourself and accepting a person for who they are is always best.

  • zombo February 28, 2012, 1:47 am

    So my ex is 20 and I’m 27. We were together for 2 and a half years. I cant stop thinking about her, it’s been a month. I’m gonna give this a whirl. I feel better even after reading it. Just gotta be strong, she is going from place to place doing God knows what and says she enjoys her freedom. Am I too late?

  • bri February 28, 2012, 5:29 am

    My boyfriend broke up with me after 8 months. It was right after valentines day and to be honest it was a bit shocking. He never really had a reason (a good one at least) and it really confused me and our mutual friends. I’ve been trying to give him space but I get really frustrated and because we have mutual friends we all still hang out. However, we no longer talk outside of the friendship and it really upsets me because he acts like we’re best friends and then ignores me outside of the hang out time. I haven’t seen him in a week and it really saddens me because reality is actually setting in. I really miss him and I don’t know what to do anymore. He hasn’t given me answers as to why he broke up with me. What do I do? What I have already done some of the above things? Is there anyway to turn it around?

  • Bob February 28, 2012, 5:31 am

    I broke my girl’s heart too many times. She won’t even talk to me, it hurts so bad.

  • QuaMain February 29, 2012, 4:33 am

    I just broke up with a girl for stupid reasons and I did it in a very rude way and I want her back but the thing was I was the rebound but she has loved me since Christmas break. BTW we are both in 7TH grade. What do I do? She doesn’t want the other dude back. I lie. She does but she still loves me. Should I wait a while and regain her trust for almost cheating on me. Help asap.

  • Pedro February 29, 2012, 6:16 am

    I broke with my girl so many times through out our 2 year relationship. I did it because I knew I would always get her back and I wanted to show her I was in control. But a month ago on new years we broke up because she couldn’t take it anymore and now she doesn’t want to date me anymore. I’ve tired everything there is to do.

  • Anonymous February 29, 2012, 6:10 pm

    I am a girl & I had a girlfriend who recently put me on a break, then broke up with me. I went to see her for her birthday just last week but everything felt so distant & I need help. I love her sooo much. We were together for 2 years and 3 months before she decided to just break off & for some reason I feel like it’s my fault. She told me I was being super negative that month and that she needed space and its literally driving me insane. I lost 16 pounds in literally less than 2 weeks and I just really need to get myself together. She keeps telling me things will fall into place for some reason I can’t believe it. I just don’t want to lose her I love her way too much. & honestly can see us being together for a while. We’re 2 of a kind. HELP 🙁

  • harshit March 1, 2012, 6:10 am

    You just leave everything on time. Don’t do anything to make him feel about you. You just behave like whatever he said you are happy with that. You will be definitely able to create feelings with time….

  • Yeng March 1, 2012, 7:14 am

    Me and My ex Penny Broke up since December. Its been quite a long time and I still miss her. I know that the past few month, I beg her to come back to me, Call her all the time and ask her for a second chance. She refuse quite obviously but she offered me as being friends after just because I beg for her to come back. She thought that it could be quite helpful to make us better too. But at the same time I guess I was getting frustrated thinking that being friends is unwanted and I wanted more than friends, I started talking to her friends about our problems maybe her friends can tell her about what needs to be done right between us but I guess It didn’t seem to turn out right. My ex yelled at me, thinking that I’m saying a whole bunch of crap about her that I was just blaming on to her. And this is where it gets ugly, She refuses to call me, answer my calls or text and even that she blocked me off Facebook knowing that I won’t be able to stalk her. I felt terrible about how I did to her. It just makes me feel useless and ugly. I can’t sleep, think or stay positive at some point. What can I do to save this. I want her back in my arms just how the way it was before. I need Help.

  • Unknown March 2, 2012, 9:09 pm

    I was with my ex for 7 yrs. I left him. We have been broken up for 3 years now but I miss him more now then ever. I just left a relationship of 2.5 years because it was not fair to him that I was still feeling for my ex. I miss both of them. My last relationship was with a man I have known for 19 yrs. I gave my ex 7 years of unconditional love. I gave him a family. I wanted things to change. He was emotionless. I love him I really do. He is now dating (rumor has it he is engaged) to this chick he has only been with since Jan 2012 (2 Months) who he tells he loves her and plans to marry her. I gave him 7 years and all he said was he wasn’t ready for marriage. Even after I had our daughter. This chick has 4 kids. Was married before. Tweeker from BFE. Is a total b**Ch. She wont let him talk to me. My daughter can not stand her. Her oldest is 12 then 11, then ? then 1. Where did I go wrong? I guess I am more hurt than anything. I have been trying to work on getting him back since before Christmas. A week later he has this hoebag in his house. UGH!!!! HELP!!

  • stephen walsh March 3, 2012, 4:21 am

    i have been with my girl friend for three years. I first met her in high school when she was 15 years old and we went through every possible thing in the world together, I cheated on her, left her, been there for her in the hospital, she went to jail for me, we had a baby together, broke up and got right back together multiple times. But after she was used an abused by this new guy she is still wanting him, but she tells me she doesn’t want him and all this other stuff and all he does is hurt her an she buries her emotions because she keeps messing with this new guy hoping it will make him want a relationship with her. When all he wants to do is screw her an walk an she can’t focus on taking care of the baby or anything. And if I don’t get her back soon my daughter is going to suffer along with me, so any help would be greatly appreciated cause all my friends say it’s because she is young and she wants to live her life when all she wants to do is be a kid and forget about hers and if I don’t get her to realize what she is doing not only effects her but our baby, I’m going to lose them both.

  • Claire March 3, 2012, 12:11 pm

    My ex broke up with me because I started to get suspicious of him staying out and finally started to ask questions. I eventually said I was unhappy he had stopped staying at mine and had been sleeping at a male friends due to the fact his phone was always switched off when he did this which he blamed on phone signal. It was an argumentative break up with him shouting and blaming me mainly. We tried to sort things both agreed we wanted to work things out but he wouldn’t completely commit to being back together officially at that point. We said we would not get involved with other people as we loved each other. But it felt the trying was one sided after the first couple of weeks. He was working lots using that as an excuse to not do things as he knew I would never complain about work. Things were fine as long as I asked no questions but when the sleeping at the friends started again with the phone off and the phone always being off around me I couldn’t help but let him know it bothered me after letting the frustration boil up. To Which he would say I don’t think we should get back together! It’s not working. Then agree to work at it for this to be repeated.  I eventually spoke to the friend he has so called been staying at who tried to lie for him. However he didn’t realize my ex had told me he stayed at his a different night to what he told me so I knew I had been lied to all along. My ex denied lying saying he was at the friends but then a week later admitted he wasn’t but refused to say where he had stayed! He didn’t want to answer any of my questions. I spoke to his mum and dad and said what had happened and the ex didn’t like that either! He got defensive and started calling me as a person for what I had done. He is still saying he had never cheated, but a week and a half later I saw him whilst driving home one night and decided to see for myself where he was going. He went to pick a girl up. He lied when he saw me saying he was working collecting money! Until the girl came out and told me he had slept hers on the date that his friend had also lied for him! He still denies cheating says he met her 3 weeks ago then it’s 2 and a half weeks ago. Making it seem like it was after me but I don’t believe that. He also told his mum and dad we split in October when we split in December! Which I don’t understand at all! We were going away for nights out together with friends during that time. I text his mum and told her he had lied to them about when we actually split. A week on after one text Message to him the day after I caught him with the girl, I find he has changed his number! I do not understand why he has tried to blame me for everything, I had to do what I had to do for my own sanity as I didn’t know what to believe anymore. He still denies cheating and then he changes his number like I am constantly in contact or something which I am most definitely not! I have known him 7 years and we have been best friends before the relationship for 5 of those. How can someone change so dramatically towards a person they have known for such a long time and why has he cut me off by changing his number? I don’t get any of it! I’ve never cheated so don’t know what people do in that situation or when they are caught out! If truth be known I’m still in love with him, and would like to talk to him to see how he feels, but at the same time I would not just dismiss his behavior or what he has done. I’m considering writing a letter but I fear no reply after changing his number, or dropping by his place? But I don’t want to do something that will make the situation worse. I need help on what to do!!

  • lianne March 3, 2012, 9:43 pm

    I was with my ex for almost 3 years. We even moved across country together. He moved back home and a couple months later I moved back. He broke up with me before I got home and is seeing someone else. I can’t get a hold of him. He doesn’t have Facebook and I don’t have his number. Its been a few months and I still talk to his sister once in awhile. She says he feels bad about what happened but didn’t want to give his number because it would mess with his head. I’ve tried meeting new people but I can’t seem to get over him. I would do anything to get him back but not only does he have a new GF but I have no contact. Running out of ideas please any advice?

  • Kiah G. March 4, 2012, 12:39 am

    My bf broke up with me about a month ago and all I can do is think about him, its so frustrating because I want him back so badly. I love him so much and I just wish there was a way to get him back because he made me so happy…now its like I am depressed all the time:(

  • Trying to hold together March 4, 2012, 11:54 am

    My love broke up with me cause I’m too flirty witch I can be… It’s one of my flaws I’m working on. Also he gets jealous over me fast which is OK. I understand because so do I. We’ve had our problems in the past and a little worse but he never broke up with me for real… I texted him a lot and when I went to get my stuff we talked and I keep asking him to work with me. Since I left his house he called me once to ask how I was doing and said he loves me but can’t be with me cause I make him jealous and a person he doesn’t want to be (with my flirtatiousness it doesn’t mean anything I don’t even know I’m doing it sometimes). We would’ve dated for a year in two days (mar 5). Advice please cause It’s killing me. I love him with a passion.

  • Niradey March 4, 2012, 4:48 pm

    Hi…been with my bf a little over a year. We love each other very much, but we just can’t seem to get along. We’ve broken up so many times than end up getting back together. Now we’re broken up again. I want him back. He tells me we need a break and be friends. I love him and I want to get him back. Please help!

  • Gabriel March 5, 2012, 12:39 am

    I just broke up with my girlfriend today and it was the worst feeling ever. We have been together for almost a year, this March 17th would be our first anniversary and it kills me to think that we can’t spent it together as a couple. She is my first true love and I can’t get her off my mind, I still want her, I always will love her and no one else. I know the best thing to do is to just keep occupied and to move forward but it’s not easy. We broke up before. She broke up with me and she came back to me and I gave the relationship another chance, but I told her that if we were to get back together major changes are going to have to be made but I was the only one changing to help our relationship. Almost a month has gone by since we’ve been back together, and just last weekend we went out and it was the best time of our lives. We loved each other so much we had an amazing time and thought how we couldn’t live without each other. Then a week later from that great date, during the week I didn’t talk to her for 2 days and she took that very seriously, she told me that she thought I was losing interest in her and maybe didn’t love her anymore but that’s not true, I do love her and always will. We got together today to talk, and I told her that I think it’s best we are not in a relationship anymore and she agreed the same thing and said that, it’s not working out and it’s best we are not together anymore. But I only agreed to the break up so it would give us a break from each other to learn from it, yes I do think it’s best for us but I still want to get back together with her again. I know she loves me, I feel it. She’s shown me, you just know when that special someone loves you, you just know it, before we broke up today she told me that she was seeing another guy while we were in the relationship still, and it came to a shock to me because I never thought she would do something like that. She’s not that kind of person, and she told me that she didn’t know he had romantic intentions for her. But I can see for her it was kinda hard that we both agreed to break up, I told her that if we do break up, I can’t see you again it will hurt me too much, and to get rid of everything that we have ever had with each other, from gifts, to letters, picture’s, clothing, to take me off of Facebook, everything I even said to delete our phone numbers from our phone today, and she had a hard time to delete my number from her phone but she did. She told me before that she still loves me. During our talk she gave me a hug when we were leaving each other, and dragged her arm down to my hand. I don’t know what that means but I still want her, more than ever now I miss her so much. What kills me is not knowing if she misses me or still wants to be with me again. I wish someone could tell me if she might be thinking about me right now and even to get back together again or even what she’s doing. I wish I could know everything. I love her more than everything and I want her back. I just need help right now. I want to know if we can still be together again.

    • Same situation. March 18, 2012, 4:50 pm

      Not only we share the situation, we also share the name. My girlfriend and I agreed to break up on basically the same grounds, same EVERYTHING, so reading about your relationship is painful. Anyway, since you broke up about two weeks earlier than me, how did the getting back work? Did you quit? Still trying? Already together? Any tips? HELP ME!

    • Mandy March 19, 2012, 3:14 am

      I read the whole entire thing, and it broke my heart! But if she dragged her arm down yours it means she wants you to chase her and doesn’t want it to be over! I’ve done the same thing with my boyfriend . She misses you, if she is not seeing someone just tell her you need her and you don’t want to live without her! You want to grow old with her! And do all the romantic things you’ve done in the past! Tell her what’s on your mind! If you don’t want to let go… DON’T!

    • Omar March 19, 2012, 10:14 pm

      Hey Bro, I feel your pain…. I met an amazing girl and I love her a lot, and we broke up recently. She moved to another country recently and stopped talking to me so we broke up :/. And to be honest sure everyone says it’s easy to move on. But when it’s true love it’s different, sure it might not be “True” love but you want it to be. I personally love my EX and we broke up and it hurts like shit. I know another girl now I’m dating, I love her and she loves me, but I always think about what would’ve been with my EX. I don’t even want her back, but just to know she’s safe and not lost with other players and jerks. So I decided to tell her the truth and I’m getting her back slowly, she’s amazing and always will be. But trust me, just tell her the truth, get her somewhere and tell her what she means to you. If it works then it’s good and if not… only then is it time to move on. And trust me, I mean it 100% when I say I know how you feel bro. I may be Muslim and you may not be. I may be different but I feel you bro. Were guys and I get you man! If you need anymore advice or help or something you have my email!

    • Shannon March 21, 2012, 6:55 pm

      For one I feel like she still loves you. For example she had a hard time deleting your number, to me she still wanted to be in contact with you. Two, walking away with the arm to the hand thing is a sign she doesn’t want to let you go. Three, I think she was buzzing you when she said she had another boyfriend because if she did then she wont flip out about you not calling for two days because she’ll be busy with her side kick. Two she had a hard time deleting your number and didn’t want to let you go. I think she said that to hurt you. And I bet she is stalking your friends to find out what you have been up to and see if you miss her. I hope it all works out for you. Good luck.

  • Sasha March 6, 2012, 7:09 am

    I need help! My boyfriend and I just broke up 4 days ago and we were together for 4 months but I’ve known him since we were in 6th grade (I’m a freshman now) and since then, he has liked me. So, a month ago I found out that he liked my best friend and I broke up with him. A week later, we started dating again. The problem is that I’m bipolar and I get jealous really easy, especially when he’s around the girls that he use to like. When we started dating again, we decided to be honest to each other no matter how bad it was and I did my job, from the beginning of our relationship, I told him I still had little feelings for my ex but it didn’t matter because he goes to another school. We promised each other that I wasn’t going to text my ex anymore and he wasn’t going to talk to my friend or even get near her. 4 days ago, my best friend and other 2 girls were in a group and I guess he was waiting for his friend but I didn’t care, I wanted him away from her. I told him to move and he kept saying he was waiting for his friend. I started counting till 5 and I turned around and left. He followed me but I ignored him. I knew that if I talked to him, I was going to break up with him and I didn’t want that, so I left. I texted him 30 minutes later explaining why I was mad and why I ignored him, I even apologized and all I got was “…. I dunno…” At that moment, I knew it was over. I begged him not to break up but he wouldn’t take me back. The next day I talked to him, I had to. I told him that… I might be pregnant. I told my mom and she was not okay, I lost all her trust. He also told his mom and she said if I was pregnant, she was going to support him but since I’m not, she doesn’t want us back together. I know he still loves me but I don’t know what to do anymore. Today I found out that he started talking to his ex, so I did the same. This is really affecting me. I did not go to one of my classes today because he has the same class, I also left school early because I couldn’t take the pain anymore. I feel like this is slowly killing me. I feel like I need him! :'( Can someone help me?

  • Brian March 6, 2012, 9:59 am

    Me and my ex fiance were together for 2 years and we recently broke up about 3 weeks ago. Idk what to do to get her back, I tried telling her how much I missed her and love her but she doesn’t want to talk to me when. I’ve bought her flowers and gifts and left them at her doorstep, I freak out because she’s seeing other guys. When we were together she might have cheated on me early in the relationship which I found hard to get over so there were trust issues, and she also said she stopped loving me because I didn’t move by her instead of the 30 minutes that I lived from her since she wouldn’t move out of her grandpa’s house. Does this mean I should up and move down there? She wanted to be friends but I couldn’t do it, is this a good thing? I just now talked her into adding me back on Facebook as a friend and convinced her to unblock my number, does this mean I should try to talk to her as a friend then work my way back in? She says she wants to talk to me but doesn’t want to see me anymore, would it be bad just to talk for awhile then try to get her to hang out with me? There was always some issues and stuff. Does this mean I should stop smoking for her even though it’s over? I don’t think she’s seeing anyone right now, any advise would be nice.

  • Danny March 6, 2012, 11:17 am

    Man I really need some help. My girlfriend and I just broke up after seven ears and I don’t feel right. I want it all to work out and so did she but now she is saying we are done and not together. We thought giving each other a month would work. But I fucked it up, I think by trying to see her. I know I shouldn’t see or talk to her. It’s just pretty hard not to. I know I need to work on myself but I want us to work so badly. People do say if it was meant to be it will work. I’m just scared because I don’t want her to see other people. What to do about this? What can I do to actually make this work again?

    • leroy63 March 22, 2012, 6:17 pm

      I feel the same way!

    • shanu March 26, 2012, 5:49 pm

      Same case is with me mate, I want my GF badly but do not know how? She stopped talking to me and replying me as well but most surprising thing was she did not tell me why she did so? I never did any thing that hurt her, she is not telling me the reason as well, I am extremely disappointed. Someone help me please.

  • zena March 7, 2012, 7:29 pm

    I always take my bf back because of pity and feeling sorry for him. I’m not happy and I want to run as far as I can from him. I am not into him anymore. He disgusts me and anytime I want to go he follows me like a dog…he is too needy and I cannot stand him. I want to be with my ex so bad, he is all I need. Distance has separated us but I am back and back to fight for him but it’s hard to get him to leave his girlfriend he lives with. He says he wants to and he is not in love with her but he just cannot pack up and leave. Why can’t he?

  • Ryan March 8, 2012, 6:56 am

    I just broke up with my girlfriend today and it’s all because of me. She said I was being harsh and she said I don’t love her when I actually do love her soo badly. And she said she cant handle me anymore. Can you help me solve my problem and help me to get her back.

  • Chris March 11, 2012, 1:16 am

    My ex girlfriend and I broke up 3 days ago. Reason? I treated her like a queen, she had a 5 year old adorable daughter at the time, we got really really attached. Me and my girl were very happy a few months ago. 2 months ago she wanted marriage, kids, moving in, all that. Well I did everything for this girl, picked her kids up from school so she could get more sleep, fixed her car, took her out to dinner, told her how beautiful she was, we started to argue because I’d get pissed when she canceled important plans to do things with her friends. She did not make me a priority. I feel like I got took for a ride. When we broke up I went to her house and basically told it how it was, I did this in anger. I told her I deserve better, and that she has used me for the last time. Well I left and she texted me crap like “sorry it didn’t work out you deserve someone great” and I replied “fuck off” and basically kept that attitude for a day until I cooled up. I went out on a date last night with a girl (more attractive than her) and she knows about it and made a comment like “well that was fast”. We are meeting tomorrow to end things the right way, civil. But I want her back. Is there anything I can do?

  • Gabrielle March 12, 2012, 4:14 am

    I went through a terrible break up with my boyfriend. But he told me it was because we could never be together and there was someone else. My friends tell me to move on, but he’s always on my mind. I’ll daydream (I never do) and I wont be able to stop until I’m distracted, then the pain comes back. I’m lost and confused; I feel lied to and betrayed. Is this how it always feels?

  • David March 12, 2012, 8:52 pm

    I’m in a very tough situation…
    About 8 months ago, my girlfriend (17 years old) had to move to Toronto because her dad got a job there. I was heart broken, and so I convinced my parents to let me go with them, as long as I was going to college up there. So I’ve been attending college, while living with my girlfriend and her parents. We fight a lot, but it’s mostly over silly things, based on our insecurities, but I’ve always been willing to work on our problems, and have never thought of leaving her. But about 2 months ago, she broke up with me. And she has been trying to force me to move out. Her parents know this, but they haven’t really told me to get out, because they’re nice people and probably understand the difficulties I’m faced with.
    So I’ve just been staying in my room everyday, and I keep telling my girlfriend that I am trying to move out.
    The truth is, that I’m not trying at all. Because I know that as soon as I’m out that door, I’ll never have a chance at being with her again. I can’t stay here in Toronto if I’m not living with her, so I’m going to have to move back home with my parents. I’ve been trying to stay as long as I can, but lately she’s really pushing me to get out.
    I’m worried that I won’t be able to win her back before I have to go…
    I don’t know what to do… We’ve been together for over 2 years, and as silly as this might sound, I am sure she is the one for me.

  • Emily March 13, 2012, 2:28 am

    I have just broke up with my BF after our 5 months relationship together. We never had fight or argument along 5 months. Everything went very well and we both were very happy. He suddenly told me he wanted to be just friends but with lots of different reasons like I am too sweet, I am too good and he isn’t good enough as a BF. But I found out 8 days later that the real reason of breaking up was he going back to his ex who he was with for 2 years. They broke up nearly a year ago and she asked him to try again. Their relationship ended because a lady said he didn’t try hard enough… My Bf feels like it was his fault of ending his relationship with her so he seemed excited to get her back and told me he is preparing to try and change because he was happy when he was with her.. He left me to go back to his ex and now he is very happy having her back…Do you think is there any chance for me to get him back?

  • Brittany March 13, 2012, 3:56 am

    So 2 years ago I broke up with my boyfriend of 7 years because I was nervous about settling down and had just graduated college and felt that I needed to be on my own for a little bit. The instant I broke up with him I knew that I had made a mistake but knew he hated me so much I tried to hide my feelings. Well now I can’t hide my feelings anymore and I am still in love with him and realized what a great relationship we had and brought the good out in each other. At this time he is currently dating someone else but we continue to speak weekly and say how much we miss and love each other. I am currently on the West coast while he is on the East coast. I gave him a decision earlier this year that I would move home to be with him. Well after many weeks of talking to one another and him telling me how unhappy he is in his current relationship, he said he can’t ask me to move home. I was devastated. I am actually moving home in a few weeks due to a family member becoming ill. Do I try to win him back when I move home or leave it as is? I know he still loves me and I still love him.

    Please help me figure out what to do about the love I let get away?

  • cherie March 13, 2012, 8:09 am

    I broke up with my ex 4 months ago cause I had too much on my plate. I know that’s a lame excuse, but there isn’t much I can do about it now.
    I still love him. I love him so much that I think about him every single day. He doesn’t wanna talk to me because I’ve “hurt” him. I don’t know what to do…

  • Jade March 15, 2012, 4:13 am

    Hi my name is Jade I am a guy and I dated a girl for 6 months I know it’s kinda short but I still fell in love with her and she’s still in love with me. She found a rebound guy and he is nothing like her. It’s really scary but I try to just let her do what she wants and make cute little remarks like you look fantastic today to her and things like that. But she is starting to like this guy and keeps telling me that she feels like she has to pick between us. I don’t really think that this is the right thing to do but I sit around and hope she comes back even though I doubt it will happen, she still tells me she loves me and talks to me very often. She even gave ma a kiss the other day and then walked away. I’m confused. Does she really truly want me back or is she trying to play games with my head.

  • christine March 15, 2012, 10:50 am

    My boyfriend and I broke up 2 weeks ago, and were actually texting everyday just to argue with the mistakes we had. He wants me back but I do want him to realize his mistakes first. We have 1 child, and he is so irresponsible. I do understand him because he is having a hard time to get a job but, I’m too annoyed with his attitude. Yes he is handsome and so attractive with the girls, way back a year ago, he fooled me many times, he had sex with so many girls. He hid our situation, and actually I am a battered girlfriend, and now, I can’t resist myself to say words that I know can hurt him. I don’t have trust anymore. That’s what we’re arguing about. I am very transparent with my feelings and sometimes I just do want to kill him, but I really really do love him. He is the father of my son, and I want us to be a happy family. From the past few days and months, granted that I can feel some effort from him to build my trust again but I cant move on from the past it’s because, even a little argument with the simple things makes my trauma from past gets back and I can’t help myself to say a lot of words that can hurt him. I don’t know how we can fix our relationship, and how can I build my trust again. I’m afraid that anytime he can find someone else, but I know I did my part. I can also feel that he loves me but not in the same way.. please do help me,:((

  • Vishal March 15, 2012, 6:49 pm

    Dear, all these mistakes are done by me… but now she doesn’t wanna talk to me and also doesn’t wanna meet me or give me a chance to rectify all things, please suggest something as soon as possible, cause this relation is at very critical stage…

  • Amy March 16, 2012, 11:18 pm

    I got into a relationship with a guy and he wanted us to get married but he traveled back and after some months he stopped calling me and now he talks to me and told me he didn’t know why he stopped calling or thinking about me…..I still love him and I want him back….I need help.

  • Lil Swag March 17, 2012, 1:34 am

    I cant really believe it. Can someone help me out? My girlfriend just broke up with me and said I don’t act like a boyfriend. She said I have really hurt her. We only dated for a day. Because during the next day of our first date, I did not look for her at her locker and I did not even hug her or kiss her. It made her angry. She said anytime I see her I don’t come to her. So I was at the gym in school when I went to sit beside her. She just laughed and I asked her is she angry with me? Then she got up and told her friend to come and tell me that she wants to break up with me and just be friends. I was really shocked and it pained me but I kept it in me and instead of going to apologize I said okay. I have now really regretted. It really pains me. What can I do to get her back?

  • Briseida March 17, 2012, 4:50 am

    Well my situation is very complicated as all the others, you see, my boyfriend broke up with me because I have an attitude problem, I’m constantly bitching and nagging and it tore us apart. I wanted to change my attitude issues but I never did, until he left me I said that if he’d give me another chance then I’d take anger management counseling to help our relationship, but he said that he won’t give me anymore chances and that’s it’s over. I don’t know what to do because I know we still love each other so much and that we always will, but how can I get him back :(?