Long Distance Relationships and Breakups

Breakups over long distance relationships are hard to stop. If your partner is on the verge of breaking up, there isn’t much you can do to stop it if you are continents away from them. In essence, it is much easier to breakup with someone if you are in a LDR than if you are living in the same city.

On the other hand, it is much harder for you if you are on the receiving end of the breakup.

In this article, I am going to outline a few tips about breaking up with someone or if someone is breaking up with you in a LDR.

If you are the one breaking up

  1. First of all, think hard before breaking up. LDRs are tough but if you get through it, it will be worth the wait. Adam Rabin shows tons of ways to make it work in this video. Unless you are absolutely sure that the relationship can’t work, you should search for the solutions of your problems instead of thinking breaking up is the best way.
  2. Be honest with your partner and make sure you give them full closure. If you care about your partner, and think of yourself as a decent human being, make sure you give them full closure and let them know exactly why you are breaking up. Breaking will be hard for both of you, and the least you can do is not make it complicated for your partner.
  3. Give them time to accept the break-up. Usually, the best option after a breakup is to stop all communication with your ex. However, in case of LDR, it is better to give them some time to accept the breakup before you stop all communication.
  4. Be honest to yourself about the breakup. If the real reason you are breaking up with them is because you want to be in a relationship with someone in your city, then you should be honest about it. Don’t try to blame the reason of breakup to relationship problems when the real reason is something else. Let your partner know your true intentions because they deserve it.
  5. Have the decency to breakup face to face via Skype or some other chatting medium. Breaking over IM or emails is not the way to go.

If you are on the receiving end of the breakup

  1. First of all, don’t beg, be needy or act desperate. The best thing you can do is accept the breakup gracefully. Don’t throw your self-respect out the window when they are breaking up with you.
  2. Try to realize that this is not the end of the world and there isn’t much you can do to stop the breakup.
  3. Try to understand the reason for breakup and accept it if it’s true. If you believe that is something you can fix, let them know that they should give it a try. However, do so in a calm and respectful manner. If you be desperate, they will surely decline your offer.
  4. Again, the best thing to do after the breakup is to let them know that you’ve accepted it and stop all communication. Your main aim should be to move on with your life.
  5. Try to refrain yourself from checking their Facebook page. It will only make you obsess over them more and more which is not healthy for you.
  6. Since you were in LDR, the chances of getting back together with them are very slim. The best thing to do would be to move on. If your ex realizes that breaking up was the wrong thing to do, they will contact you and will want to make it work.
  7. If you are planning to surprise them by driving down to your ex’s city with a box full of chocolates and a trunk full of flowers, DON’T DO IT. It’s just going to make you look like a fool and you will be more embarrassed than ever to find out they have already moved on.
  8. Don’t try to find out if they’ve started dating someone else or not. It is very likely that they are in a rebound relationship and it is a good idea that you also start dating someone else and move on with your life.

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